New Kid (yeah right!!!!) on the Blog

New Kid (yeah right!!!!) on the Blog

Friday, December 31, 2010

Touching Story to end the Year


A truly touching story….

A man was sitting on a blanket at the beach. He had no arms and no legs.

Three women, from England, Wales, and Scotland, were walking past and felt sorry for the poor man.

The English woman said 'Have you ever had a hug?' The man said 'No,' so she gave him a hug and walked on.

The welsh woman said, 'Have you ever had a kiss?' The man said, 'No,' so she gave him a kiss and walked on.

The Scottish woman came to him and said, 'ave ya ever been screwed laddie?'
The man broke into a big smile and said, ‘no’.

She said, 'Aye - Ya will be when the tide comes in.'

Thursday, December 30, 2010

X Mas 2010 at Waddy

This is the video portion of our Christmas at my sister's house

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Leftovers for Lunch

I just know that y'all are gonna feel sorry for me having to clean up leftovers for lunch. Monday, I had pulled pork, mash potatoes & gravy, and corn. Yesterday for lunch, I had Beef Strogandorf (or sounds like it) with noodles. Today, I had a little country ham, dark meat turkey, macaroni & cheese, and dumplins. Tomorrow.....I'll just open up the next batch of tupperwear type containers and see what I come up with.
Hell, I might just have enough stuff left to take to the cabin this weekend so that I don't have to cook! I'll just have to pop it in the oven and heat it up.

Monday, December 27, 2010

Hills X Nas 2010

Here is the "slideshow video" from our Christmas at my sister's house in Waddy, Kentucky. The kids are my Great Nieces and Nephew from Arkansas and one from here in Frankfort.

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Kentucky Christmas

We had clean roads and light traffic going to and from Cincinnati on Christmas Eve. We didn't encounter any snow until we were almost back home.
On Christmas Day, we got up and celebrated our Christmas. Kim and Marisa surprised me by getting and suiting up the mutts with their own "Gay Apparel"!
We spent the afternoon and evening at my sister's house near Waddy, Ky. My nephew was in from Arkansas with his family. His kids got the pleasure of experiencing sledding in snow for the first time. I helped document this by sitting comfortably in my nice warm truck, and utelized my zoom lens and video camera.
Like always, there was way too much food, all of which was delicious. I got so stuffed that I tried to beg off doing the magic show.... but, the kids wouldn't have any part of that! So, I did a smaller show than last year and got each kid "help me" with a trick. They seemed to have enjoyed it.
My brother-in-law, Junie, is a big Univ of Louisville Fan...(pretty much hates Univ of KY). So, Kim bought 5 UK blue sweat shirts and put them in a box for Junie to open. Then, he got to pass them out which the kids all wore for the rest of the night!
Poor Marisa, our "only child" sure had it rough again this year. All she got was..... just about everything a 32" flat screen HD TV, and a Playstation 3 game system.
When I got home, I downloaded the pictures with the kids and made a slideshow video, complete with music. Then around 2:00A.M. when I hit the button to "SAVE THE VIDEO TO YOUR COMPUTER"....the damned computer froze up! I let it sit overnight to see if it would work itself out. IT DIDN'T!
This morning, I got the damned thing rebooted and started all over again. This time, it worked out fine and I was able to save it and post it on YouTube for e-mailing it out to the family.

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Computer Glitch

I am starting to have a reoccuring problem with the computer. It started this odd behavior about a year ago.
The darn thing shuts down during the night, or while it's sitting idle. When I try to restart it, It won't come on. However, the CPU emits a ticking sound.
Last year, when it first did it, I took it in to the shop. It worked perfect for them. Then, when it did it a couple weeks later, I had the tech come here to the house. He stated that I had too much stuff hooked up to it. He suggested that I unhook the Copier, external hard-drive, and speakers when not using them.
Well, I followed those instructions ....for about a week.... and had no more problems.... until yesterday.
I've tried unhooking everything, and turning it off for a couple of hours...with little success.
Then after about 5 times of shutting it off and finally fired up.
So, I might be off the air for a week or so after Christmas, so I can put this thing in the shop.

Friday, December 17, 2010

Romance Novel Attempt?

Well, here I am on a Friday night at home, on the computer, thanks to the ice....instead of down at my cabin in the woods.
I just got finished downloading another "book on tape" onto my Ipod Shuffle. I enjoy listening to it while working or driving. Mostly I like mystery or action type books, but, I have branched out on other kinds too. As a matter of fact, I have enjoyed several books by Daniel Steele. Of course, the wife commented on my reading "chick books".
Well hell, I thought us big ole rough and tumble guys were supposed to " get it touch with our gentler side"!
So, I thought about that a little...and decided that I'd try writing a "Romance Novel" using my "gentler side" approach.
So, here attempt at "tuning into the feminine approach to writing":

He Grasped me firmly but gently just above my elbow and guided me into a
room, his room. Then he quietly shut the door and we were alone.

He approached me soundlessly, from behind, and spoke in a low, reassuring
voice close to my ear. "Just relax."

Without warning, he reached down and I felt his strong, calloused hands
start at my ankles, gently probing, and moving upward along my calves slowly
but steadily. My breath caught in my throat. I knew I should be afraid,
but somehow I didn't care. His touch was so experienced, so sure.

When his hands moved up onto my thighs, I gave a slight shudder, and partly
closed my eyes. My pulse was pounding. I felt his knowing fingers caress
my abdomen, my ribcage.. And then, as he cupped my firm, full breasts in
his hands, I inhaled sharply. Probing, searching, knowing what he wanted,
he brought his hands to my shoulders, slid them down my tingling spine and
into my panties.

Although I knew nothing about this man, I felt oddly trusting and
expectant. This is a man, I thought. A man used to taking charge. A man
not used to taking "No" for an answer. A man who would tell me what he
wanted. A man who would look into my soul and say ... "Okay Mam," said a
voice, "All done."

My eyes snapped open and he was standing in front of me, smiling, holding
out my purse. "You can board your flight now."

Thursday, December 16, 2010

How to Give a Cat A Pill

How to Give a Cat a Pill

Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby.

Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth.

Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa.

Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.

Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm, holding rear paws tightly with left hand.

Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.

Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe.

Call spouse in from the garden.

Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws.

Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

Retrieve cat from curtain rail.

Get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit.

Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw

Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans and drink one beer to take taste away. Apply band-aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

10. Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed.

Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard, and close door onto neck, to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.

Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink.

Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss back another shot. Throw tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12. Call fire department to retrieve the damn cat from the top of the tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat.

Take last pill from foil wrap.

Using heavy-duty pruning gloves from shed, tie the little *&#%^'s front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of filet steak. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour two pints of water down throat to wash pill down.

Consume remainder of scotch. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room. Sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.

15. Arrange for RSPCA to collect mutant cat from hell and call local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.

How To Give A Dog A Pill

1. Wrap it in bacon.

2. Toss it in the air.

Something to be Thankful For

Sorry folks....couldn't resist this one!

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Getting a little Nippy

Well, here it is, still a week to go before the start of Winter. Right now it's 4 degrees, with a high expected of 17 degrees today. Then, during the day, they are calling for some snow flurries along with 1/4- 1/2 inch of ice/sleet!
I've got 4 wheel drive so the snow don't bother me....but, if we get the ice..... I'm just gonna burrow down in my "mancave" and wait it out. Got plenty of coffee and Pepsi so I'm ready for it!